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Just Go With It 2


The woman’s guide to marriage

Just go with it means improvise, as opposed to following the rules. Democracy destroyed manners & imposed equality. Democracy stands, therefore, between a woman & happiness. – Democratic men can be boorish… She might love this man – but his rampant womanizing astonishes & makes her indignant. What decent man could do that? But will a decent man make you happy? Is not his womanizing innocent, in a way, if childish?

Look at her kids. The boy is retarded, being fatherless: he lacks courage, sports, adventures, energy, & confidence. The girl is an aspiring actress. But all children imitate adults & therefore act. The woman resembles her children: they misunderstand neediness. She also becomes an actress. She acts in a romantic comedy in order to learn romance. The romance requires enacting the man’s fantasy in order to seduce him. The comedy requires turning divorce into marriage. – Both desire & the courage to chase the man. – Acting in another sense means deceiving. This seems to be the school of love. Forgetting oneself is necessary; mistaking one’s own is necessary. The woman starts by taking romance as a joke; at the end, the joke is on her.

This woman typifies the moralistic attitude, which in a romantic comedy is usually the woman’s problem. She makes herself plain & unappealing. This suggests women mistrust beauty: comedy can show woman’s lack of confidence. – For example, this one confides in her children & they easily tyrannize her. The man can stop that, because he has his own life. Children, unlike women, usually know better than to annoy men. – Only women contend with men, which is the fun in romantic comedy. This quarrel means the woman must learn to compete with other women. She implicitly admits that men only love ugly women for their personality; that before attaching a man’s affection, a woman has to attract it; & that beauty & pleasure are better guides to marriage than moralizing, bitterness, & resentment. This also shows courage & therefore the end of feminism.

Adam Sandler, for example, is only shown in reparatory surgery. Making right other people’s wrongs is unusual, & a show of skill & generosity both. As to the children, by degrees he acts like a father toward them. Nowadays, that’s not that hard. His casual wardrobe shows how informal & democratic he is. – He is so much her equal, in fact, he does very little to seduce her. When it comes to choosing between the young woman – who tires him out – & the older woman – who knows his weaknesses but will not expose them – there is not much love to help him decide. But the statuesque young woman has no need of him…